Lost You infront of Me

honestly , i can always miss him when i study .
it's quite weird and not focus on study right ?
but i know my target is to get good result and can get a good job !
he always send me back home after end class ,
this is enough to me already . 

when i looking at him , my tears will come out accidently .
i feel the most love man is him , so i afraid that many thing of him .
am i crazy for him ? my friends say yea !
if i fall in love , i not myself anymore .

today my stomach very pain because menstrual problem ,
i recall back that he will give me hot water or massage my stomach .
but we not same college already , so this will not happen .
i miss that moment , how he take care of me when my stomach feel pain .

just nw i hug him tightly , i will cry .
i'm crying baby , i like to cry and can cry easily .
my college friends afraid when i silent , they say i will silent before i want cry .
i just stare at him , touching his hair , look at his eye .
this is my man , shaun .

i will hold his finger or shirt when he say he want to leave ,
this is my habit because i never want him leave me alone .
quite weird to me actually , i do not know i cry for what reason .
but i always think of one problem .

what is the problem ? i always think that i will wish him happy with other girl .
i like to dreaming or think too much .

example :

i hang out with my friends to sunway pyramid after class ,
suddenly , someone look like him , he is quite tall .
but , he holding other girl's hand ! i asking myself :" who is that girl ? " 
he turn back , that definitely is him !

how sad am i ? how hurt i get ? my tears is coming out .
i try to control my tears out from the eyes , i just pass by them .

i say : " hello , why you be here ? this girl is ..? "

if that girl is his girl friends , then i will know what i should do .

i will say : " wish both of you blissful forever . "

then i will turn back and my tears drop down .


* do not try to cold to me , i will think too much . *